Just wondering...looking back and looking forward

It’s been almost a year since life changed in Puerto Rico. It’s easy to look back, but more difficult to look forward.

I think we wisely chose to concentrate fixing things close to our home. We’re relieved to be off the grid, no longer flinching when the rain comes wondering if the light will go. The pool is better than ever, having replaced the 25 year old motor for one that is variable speed, etc. The lattice and fencing is up and the deck has been repainted. The water well is housed in a new room and the barn is roomy, sturdy and ready for future projects.

And that’s where my thoughts hit a stand still.

The restaurant and casitas are still untouched. The exterminator comes every two months as if nothing has happened and the green casita has been used overnight by friends. I don’t know if they notice the bends and gaps in the screens or the “splinter” in the ceiling reminiscent of patching the roof with metal sheets on the ground. The cottages are almost 20 years old. Switch plates have rusted edges, yellowed books should be tossed and the shades have seen better days, but it still feels like my envisioned “casita del campo”.

The yellow casita makes my heart sink. Flowers and vines invading the openings where screens once were reminding me that “doing nothing” is giving permission to the jungle to take back its land.

As we finish up the barn, we’ll be taking back our “business in the back”. For what purpose? I don’t know yet, but we have to.